Thursday, November 22, 2012

How many times can you secretly say "i miss you" without doing anything stupid,

just repeatedly saying it, hopefully, until it loses its power and goes away?

I miss you, steve. I miss you, i miss you, i miss you - a hundred times i miss you.

Please let me move on.

Monday, November 12, 2012

It's been months.

Three months since we first began talking. A month and a day since we last spoke. You've moved on.

I find myself missing you terribly these days- I don't know why. I unfriended you because seeing you date someone else was just too difficult. I have a limited ability to stalk you still, whether because we have a mutual friend or because I am still somehow subscribed to your feed, idk. It's torture, too.

I should stop, I know. Some days I wish you'd show up at my door, asking that we start over. There are so many things wrong with scenario, so many reasons why it's improbable.

It was never meant to be - I know that. I suspect the reason it's been so hard for me to let go is that in the past two years you're the only one I ever let inside, the only one who really made me feel alive again and, consequently, the only one who could and did let me down. I meant what I said, tho: I wish you luck, and hope you find what you're looking for. For what we had, however briefly, I thank you. I hope to move on too. Till then, I miss you still, good-looking.