and instead of being thrilled or pleased about it, I felt sad.
I'm not ready yet, I know.
People tell me that I am strong, though I don't feel it. I feel like a crazy person. I burst into tears and throw pity parties for one, have a good cry, and plan my next outing with a newfound friend. I am alternately hopeful and despairing, angry and indifferent, resentful and understanding.
I hope to look back on this time and say, "They were right. I held myself with dignity and quiet strength, and emerged a better person."
If I seem so happy, why do I feel so fragile and sad?
Sunday, July 31, 2011
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